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- "Posh was gutted whe she saw the state of
   Baby and Sporty at the Spice Girls' reunion."

- "Collars and cuffs have no chance of
   matching now!"

- "Shoes and Spider - brothers in arms."

- "And the winner of Cock Of The Year 1981 is....."

- "Proof that Keith Lemon was ginger when
   he was young

- "So, do you think you'll improve England's
   ranking Roy?"

   "Wanking? How dare you Hawwy!"

- "Thank god you're not wearing one of Our
  Kid's black suede hats, Damon - you'd look
   a total twat in one of them."

- "Noel congratulates the winner of the 2012
    Norman Wisdom Lookalike competition"

"Jeez, Kenny, look at that bloke in the
   black suede hat! What the hell does
   he think he looks like?"

"Hands up if you hate Man U...
    Hands up if you hate Man U"

- "No wonder Mr Benn wasn't very forthcoming
   with the invites to his new London pad."

- "Ken Bates' hotel was taking shape."

- "The Greeks suddenly realise austerity has gone
     too far."

"Sorry but my driving instructor said to stick
     to the white line!"

Mr Benn woke up in his tent at Glastonbury
  and wasn't sure the effects of Jeremy's
  cakes had completely worn off.


- "If she's got a sister I'll be round
    in half an hour."


- "The 2012 Olympic show jumping tickets
   might have been overpriced thought Jim"

- "This wasn't the company car scheme Jim

- "Bernie Ecclestone had gone too far this time
   in his attempt to boost the F1 viewing figures."

- "Nice hair!"


- "The final of 'Mr Gay UK 2011' reaches an
    exciting climax"

- "Hands up if you've had an encounter with
   Bruno The Beard at El Camion in Soho."

- "Hands up who likes E*brace?" - Mr C was
   in the middle of another of his funny dreams.

- "Are you the Lighthouse Family?"

- "Since Wacko Jacko's death, Becks found
   that judging the King Of Pop Lookalike
   Contest was getting more difficult every
   year as the standard dropped."

 - "
When I said I wanted a greenhouse..."

-"No, surely not her too? That's Ann Widdecombe!"


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